May 10, 2005

pennsylvania recap part une / anti-bad thoughts

I wrote this at work today. Which explains the capitalized letters. heh heh.

I�m such an overreactor. (Overreacter. Over-reactor. Ooh, third time�s a charm, I guess; the red squiggly lines went away on that hyphenated one.) I can�t help it. I�m also doomed to endless inner turmoil because I am half logic, half emotion. All the time. I am so up and down lately, it�s driving me crazy. But anyway. Finally, this morning, as I was on the verge of an emotional breakdown (on the QM24 express bus, passing by all the graveyard cities on the way into The City), I realized that I may not make it through the day without crying. Considering how rarely I cry, this was not a good sign, I realized. So a little while after arriving at the office, I text messaged K and told her I want to start working out with her. That I�ve got to do something about this depression thing and that I needed her help. And also that I don�t know why it�s so hard for me to ask for help. But it is. So anyway, of course she�s here to help. Friends are good. I�m going straight to her house after work today so we can work-out. (Shocking, I know.) Sadly, the second dance pad for DDR (Dance Dance RevoLUtion, come on, get WITH it) is at MY house, so we�ll have to do something else tonight. I hope it�s not Tae-Bo.

Speaking of Tae-Bo, did anyone see the movie �Bringing Down the House� with Queen Latifah (and Steve Martin, of course)? If so, wasn�t that part with the bitchy rich white woman doing the Tae-Bo moves hilarious?

I forgot that I never wrote about my trip to Pennsylvania. Not sure how I forgot about that, possibly because I hadn�t told my parents I went yet, and now that I�ve told them, I guess it�s all right. Of course, I already posted the PICTURES...but anyway. Pennsylvania.

We arrived at the hotel around 4 or 4:30, I think, and after we unloaded all our things into the room (which was no small task�not a light packer, Kristen, and I�m not much lighter myself) we took a walk through downtown Harrisburg. Not altogether very exciting, but it was nice and relaxing, and the Capitol building and the lawn and statues were very pretty. She took some pictures, I think, although I don�t remember seeing those...oh well. When we realized there wasn�t really much to do (all the shops were closed at 5:30 on a Monday), we headed back to the hotel and decided to find some shopping (i.e. a mall). The concierge gave us directions to one. We found it very easily, but we kept driving to see what else was around, including possible places to eat dinner. That�s when we went past the mexican restaurant (whatever it was called, but there was a picture of the sign) we ended up having dinner at. (I like to end sentences in prepositions. I was thinking the other day that J.K. Rowling doesn�t use a lot of commas in a lot of places I would use commas. Maybe it�s an English thing? btw, I�m reading the 5th Harry Potter again so that when Book 6 comes out in July I�ll be all ready!!) Down the road from the mall we got really excited when we found all kinds of wonderful stores such as: Famous Footwear, Kohl�s, TJ Maxx, Marshall�s, Target, Michael�s, Ben Franklin�s (which I�ve still never been to), etc. It was a bargain shopper�s dream, that strip mall. We ended up only having time for Famous Footwear (I bought a pair of New Balance shoes) and Kohl�s (we bought them out). We had eaten at the random mexican place before the shopping, explaining why we had such little time. Not that it mattered if you were to look at our receipts. I digress. (A lot and often.) The mexican food was all right. They didn�t use any cheddar cheese, only jack, and it was very odd dipping chips and tortillas into queso made from jack cheese. White queso: huh? And also: why did the waitress look at us like we had 10 heads (each) when we asked for tortillas? Uh, hello? TorTIllas. Anyway, it was odd. Kind of like the way the people look at us at the On the Border on Long Island when we once asked for butter with our tortillas. Butter? Why in the world would you need butter? Uh, duh: because it TASTES good, dumbass. If all of these doubting Thomases would go home and spread butter on their hot tortillas, I swear: the world would be a better place. At least for their taste buds. (Is taste buds two words?)

Uh, let�s see now...K�s aunt came to join us for Gettysburg that next morning. We had a lovely free full American breakfast because we are�Priority Club Members. WATCH out. But anyway, so K and I drove in her car while Aunt followed us in hers. It was such a quick trip; only took about 40 minutes or so. Anyway, the freaking directions from Mapquest were retarded, because downtown Gettysburg (the charmingest of a charming little place) has one of those circle things. Like �the Circle,� you know, in Waco? Oh you don�t know? What? You haven�t been to Waco? Well, Kim knows what I�m talking about, don�tcha Kim? Anyway, you know: you drive around the circle and there are 3 different streets you can turn off onto, or if you make the full circle it�s just a u-turn? Well, anyway, Mapquest was calling it a �turnabout.� What the heck is that? Anyway, we finally decided to go first to the outlet mall (because that�s what we do). We spent WAY longer at the outlet mall than we had intended. Not surprised. I spent my life savings. Not really. I don�t have any life savings. haHA!

After the shopping, we drove back over to the heart of Gettysburg, actually right on the outskirts of town, but it�s not really like the outskirts; it�s like, hi, here�s downtown and then, hi, you�re on the battlefields. But yeah, we went to this General Pickett�s Buffet Restaurant, and it was pretty decent. Only there were like 4 busloads of middle schoolers there, which was interesting, because as you know, middle school boys think I am their age, and therefore: they stare. Ah. It�s OK, though: they can�t help it. After dinner we were off for our �candlelit Ghosts of Gettysburg� tour. (Did I mention that it was way colder on this trip than it should ever be in late April?) It was pretty fun, although I think we were all under the impression that the tour was going to lead us inside various houses, where in fact only led us to the OUTside of them. But it was still fun. Not scary, but definitely fun. We didn�t see or feel any ghosts, sadly.

Written now:

I hadn't finished my Pennsylvania recap, but I've got to go to bed now, and i just wanted to post an entry to say, yes, i'm still alive, and no, i'm not going to throw myself in front of the express bus when it comes in the morning. i'm still here! life is better today than it was yesterday! and also: my wonderful friend muppet23 sent me a package, and it was so exciting. she is the coolest girl ever, kids. not to mention sweetest. the only bad thing about making such great friends on d-land is that it makes me sad that i don't live in the same freaking CITY. alas. but...we'll always have email. (get it? kinda like "we'll always have paris? nevermind, that was bad.)

K and i worked out tonight, and it sucked, but it was also great. (you know how working out can be like that?)and i had two healthy meals today, and now i might eat some cereal before bed, because isn't cereal great before bed?

the only thing making me cranky right now is the upstairs neighbors playing a movie on surround sound after 11 pm. and it's not just any movie, either; it's one that has bombs going off. GREAT, people. i knew this apartment had to be too good to be true. well, not that it's a dreamland or anything (at ALL), but i just mean with my neigbhor situation. until my last landlord sold the house, it was SO QUIET. like heaven. sigh. i wish i had money, because i would SO BUY. i hate apartments. i want a house, and one that is not connected to any other houses. someone shoot my neighbors and their 3 children who REALLY like bouncing balls on their wood floors. dear God. wait, 5 minutes ago i was happy, wasn't i? heh heh. well, i should really go to bed. this has got to be the longest entry EVAH. nite nite.

blueavenue at 11:09 p.m.

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